I can honestly say that I have not had a day like today in a long time. And I look forward to it being a long time until it happens again. I went into full meltdown mode today. Hormones completely out of whack. One minute I was yelling at my poor pet for not getting out of my way and the next minute I was bawling at work. (horrifying, but thankfully I work with a lot of good and understanding people)
Called my doctor who suggested that this happens every once in a while and that I take my multivitamin at a different time (because it might be affecting the absorption of the pill). These things don't make me any less happy to be having PMS and feeling like Violet after eating the berry in Willy Wonka but I know this too shall pass. And if things don't get better next month I'll be getting a new pill. (This portion of the TMI section is over.)
One of my good friends loaned me her Weight Watchers All-Time Favorites cook book today and I've been scouring it for good vegetarian recipes. That's one of the things that has hampered my success in the past - I'm impatient and I am not a cook. I have been very lucky to live with many roommates that are good cooks but I've just never gotten into it. I've been looking at the recipes in this book and I am impressed with the focus on the tastes. I know that's the point in cooking - making it taste good - but this book helps to focus on making it taste good with ingredients that aren't going to stop the heart.
So, I was in full comfort food mode today and I am proud to tell you that I still have more than 1/2 of my daily points. The saving grace has been that I stocked up on foods that are pre-portioned out and that I like. (novel concept)
Breakfast was 1 Dannon Light & Fit and I bought some Fiber One yogurt, they are only 50 calories (compared to the Dannon at 60) and have more fiber. Still each just 1 point.
Then, even though I was stressed and irritable AND crying I did not go find whatever baked goods were lying around the office to hoover them into my mouth (a tried and true "poor me" pacifier). When I really HAD to have a treat I ate a sugar free chocolate pudding. 2 points and very worth it.
I was still craving sugary taste later (and did not bring 2 puddings with me....on purpose) so I had an apple sauce cup and am still lovin my Lifewaters. Strawberry was the theme today and it was very good.
At about 3 my co worker reminded me that I hadn't had lunch yet and I was craving salt (really, really wanted to go buy a little packet of salted peanuts from the vending machine but I looked it up and O.M.G. SEVEN POINTS?!!!!) so I made myself a weird chicken/egg drop soup thing from my medifast packets. 2 points and nice and filling.
Got home after a late afternoon meeting and devoured 4 light string cheeses (5.5 points) and my focus for dinner is going to be on vegetables. I crave protein when I'm hormonal like this and I could probably sit down and eat eggs and cheese and cheese and eggs until my arteries clogged. Tonight I will dig into one of my bargain purchases from yesterday - the Chik N Strips.
OH, and may I just say "YAY ME" for a second here? It's been hot here (and muggy) and today, to say thank you, our boss (the one that freaked out in happiness when I took her a bunch of chocolate and diet soda) handed out ice cream bars/cones...... Do you know how badly I wanted a nutty bar? Or an ice cream sandwich?? Yeah. Hormones make it worse. But, I didn't even look. I popped the top on my diet soda and told myself that I have another chocolate pudding at home.
Tonight's big goal will be to do something other than be one with my couch. Yesterday's walk counted. Today I have not done that. Did not do yoga last night. Went straight to bed, heavily medicated. (Still had 5 points left for the day I might add.) So, tonight I'm going to let that obnoxious little Wii voice tell me I'm obese and I'm going to work on bringing some damn balance into my life. :)
One day. One pound. One step at a time.
~N
Ps. Tonight I set up my Mii character on the Wii. complete with the humiliation of "that's obese" and "you are unbalanced" but I did balance and stretching and hula hooping for 15 minutes. And THAT is a yay me. (plus I only ate 1/2 my dinner)
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