I am a sentimental person. I have a personal tradition on the last day of the year that I write in a journal, reviewing the year and things I have done/gone through. This year I wrote my review last night and I compared this year with 10 years ago, 10 years before that and 10 years before that. One of the things I was looking at was how technology had changed - I was sitting on my couch, playing on my laptop while my roommate was able to check news, the weather and even star-gaze with his new android cell phone. In my review I compared my head-space from the last 30 years with this year and one of the things I noticed was that I am so much happier I am this year than I have been in years. And while it's true I have packed on 5 pounds since November - it's all about the sugar and the drinks and the NOT exercising - it is also true that I got myself back onto weightwatchers online. Since their new points changed up I had a hard time adjusting and, did I mention the not exercising? Yeah it's been a wee bit nuts at my work and I have gotten out of the good habit of doing my daily reports both here and on the WW website.
But there's no time like NOW to be back in the habit and I started that now on Sunday. Yes, the day after Christmas. Surprisingly enough I had not overdone it for dinner the day before....that's because of the tequila. See, I have this other tradition - it started when my roommate moved here 5 years ago and we got together for Christmas and drank an entire (small bottle) of 1800. And every year since then it's been our little thing. However, usually it starts like this: get up early, make mimosas (champagne and orangejuice) and open presents, then the roommate makes a big, huge fabulous dinner. And we drink a bottle of tequila and eat ourselves silly. This year we didn't make the dinner. Just drank. And I was asleep by 10pm.
So, I went to the grocery store to stock up on good for me food (because when I don't get groceries I go out to eat and that's hardly ever good) and I found a new thing from Safeway - they are snack packs, find them where the packaged salads are. They have little packets of baby carrots and a tiny dish of ranch. Then there's one that's got grapes, baby carrots, cheddar cheese and crackers (150 cal - 4 points) and one that has baby carrots, pea pods, cheese and ranch (150 cal - 3 points). Having handy snacks is key for my success. That and soup. (fills me up and low cal)
The new points system well....it doesn't make sense to me yet but it bumped my daily points allowance by over 10 points. However, many of the things I was used to eating (bread, cheese, tofurky) went up in points. The main thing I notice is that fruits and veggies are almost all zero points. So, I started back up on Monday and will weigh in on Sunday as usual. Tonight we have friends coming over and we are drinking and who knows what else, but I always look at the start of a new year as the opportunity to clean the slate and start again. This year I'm not exactly starting again because I am still down 25 pounds from where I was in August and no clue how far down from a year ago this time.
I hope that each of you has a good start to the brand new year. Happy New Year!
Remember that if you put your mind to it you can do anything. And just keep taking it
One day, One step, One pound at a time.
~N
Friday, December 31, 2010
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Wa-ho-doreeeee
I'm still here. It is indeed the season for.....EATING. So I shall blog soon. And I wish you all a Merry Christmas. Jess - I am sooooooo jealous. Take lots of pictures. I am living vicariously.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Thank you. Now stop whining and focus. (the longest day)
The title of this blog is for me. So anyone else (RW) tempted to think it's about you....it's not. ;)
Now then. I had a very, very important and stressful and milestone inducing week. And none of it has to do with the diet. (which reminded me and I just stepped on the scale.....eeek.....2 pounds back on.....FOCUS!!!)
So the reason the week was all of those things is wrapped up in my job. Remember a few blogs back where I said I made a big decision and it was about my job? So I have really not liked my boss and the way the administration/management runs where I work. I do realize that in order to run a company, any company, you must have a vision for the long-term and you have to be willing to make the hard choices. However, the way they choose to communicate with their employees is the most bass-ackward (figure it out) thing I have ever seen. Honestly I believe it has to do with the fact that it is a religious-based organization and they don't know how to say "yes, we believe in a god that is kind and loving to people and we are trying to show that to our customers" and how to manage their employees. The disconnect between the "mission" statement and the actual reality is profound.
In the nearly 10 years I have worked for this company I have seen them (especially in the department I work in) take people that have given years if not decades of their lives - even donating their time (clocking out and still working) and say "thank you for your service" and then either firing or "retiring" them. Over and over. The easiest way to see it coming is if a person has to have any sort of surgery or prolonged illness and absence. As soon as they come back to work they have 2 months or less until they are "let go". About a month ago we were all called into a meeting where our director informed us that the company is not making budget - by about $10 million. (she did not give us the total, she spread it out in a talk but anyone paying attention could add the numbers up.....) The point of this talk was to get us ready for cuts. It was clear that administration was sending the department heads out to warn the staff to get ready for some painful cuts.
This last week the axe fell. And it was one of the most stressful weeks I have experienced maybe ever. It started a couple of weeks ago when one of my friends that had a surgery and extended medical leave this summer (yep) told me she was retiring... OK, so part of this is because she is still not doing well but she is not full retirement age. And then we were told (or found out) that the deadline for making cuts to meet budget was Friday the 3rd. (Also my roomate's birthday.) So we had a retirement party for my friend on Thursday and the most telling and poignant (and chilling) moment came at the end when the director actually choked up when paying tribute to my friend. This is highly unusual for the big boss and was cause for attention.
Then in the afternoon all of us in the office started getting appointments with our direct supervisor. Starting with me at 10am on Friday. And being the CSI person I am I put 2 and 2 together and KNEW that this was where the big life-changing news was going to happen. All afternoon on Thursday I fretted and compared notes with my co-workers. At the very end of the day one of my closest friends who is also a co-worker was called into her supervisor's office (after her counterpart in another area of our department was laid off entirely) and told that she was getting a reduction in salary AND having her hours cut as well as having to absorb the other person's duties... This led to me not sleeping well at ALL on Thursday night. Stomach ache. Crying.
I even cleaned out the majority of any personal effects from my desk before I left on Thursday. See, the last job I had before this was my dream job and I lost it one day without a clue. Without warning. And I told myself NEVER AGAIN would I get caught that unaware. I have and will always have a box under my desk. Just in case.
So, on Friday morning I woke up at 4:50am. Wide awake. Not even my cat believed me when I got up and started paying bills online. The night before I had figured out my budget in case I was cut by 1 day a week (as had already happened to others) and I had bills to pay in case... I got to work on time. Zero appetite for any breakfast so I drank water and tried to concentrate. By this time almost every person in my office had a meeting set up with our boss. Without going into the details of exactly what happened in the meeting I will say this: I am both incredibly lucky and thankful. They did cut my job, the job that I was doing up until Friday, but then they also gave me increased responsibilities for what amounts to the lead position in the office. With no cuts. There were only 2 other people that I know of in the office that did not have their pay or hours cut on Friday.
I am someone that firmly believes in being willing to adjust your plans and what happened to me on Friday adjusted my plans. Yes, I am still working for a boss that I could write books about (she really IS that bad) and yes I still think that management does a piss-poor job of communicating with their staff, not to mention makes crappy decisions in terms of budget. However I am no longer looking for a new job. They have shown that they trust me enough to put me into a key position at a time when they are having to make cuts all over the place. And I am going to honor that by telling myself that I will be thankful that I have a job and I am going to stop whining and work. I am not going to look for a new job. Mind you, if one falls into my lap and it's the right job? I will do that (it would be highly stupid to ignore a good opportunity). But in the meantime I will be thankful and shift my focus to this fitness journey.
Because this week I gained TWO POUNDS. And THAT is not the direction I want to go. So it's back to work. On my job and on my fitness. And focus not only on health but on being thankful. The T in TCN.
One day. One pound. One step at a time.
~N
Now then. I had a very, very important and stressful and milestone inducing week. And none of it has to do with the diet. (which reminded me and I just stepped on the scale.....eeek.....2 pounds back on.....FOCUS!!!)
So the reason the week was all of those things is wrapped up in my job. Remember a few blogs back where I said I made a big decision and it was about my job? So I have really not liked my boss and the way the administration/management runs where I work. I do realize that in order to run a company, any company, you must have a vision for the long-term and you have to be willing to make the hard choices. However, the way they choose to communicate with their employees is the most bass-ackward (figure it out) thing I have ever seen. Honestly I believe it has to do with the fact that it is a religious-based organization and they don't know how to say "yes, we believe in a god that is kind and loving to people and we are trying to show that to our customers" and how to manage their employees. The disconnect between the "mission" statement and the actual reality is profound.
In the nearly 10 years I have worked for this company I have seen them (especially in the department I work in) take people that have given years if not decades of their lives - even donating their time (clocking out and still working) and say "thank you for your service" and then either firing or "retiring" them. Over and over. The easiest way to see it coming is if a person has to have any sort of surgery or prolonged illness and absence. As soon as they come back to work they have 2 months or less until they are "let go". About a month ago we were all called into a meeting where our director informed us that the company is not making budget - by about $10 million. (she did not give us the total, she spread it out in a talk but anyone paying attention could add the numbers up.....) The point of this talk was to get us ready for cuts. It was clear that administration was sending the department heads out to warn the staff to get ready for some painful cuts.
This last week the axe fell. And it was one of the most stressful weeks I have experienced maybe ever. It started a couple of weeks ago when one of my friends that had a surgery and extended medical leave this summer (yep) told me she was retiring... OK, so part of this is because she is still not doing well but she is not full retirement age. And then we were told (or found out) that the deadline for making cuts to meet budget was Friday the 3rd. (Also my roomate's birthday.) So we had a retirement party for my friend on Thursday and the most telling and poignant (and chilling) moment came at the end when the director actually choked up when paying tribute to my friend. This is highly unusual for the big boss and was cause for attention.
Then in the afternoon all of us in the office started getting appointments with our direct supervisor. Starting with me at 10am on Friday. And being the CSI person I am I put 2 and 2 together and KNEW that this was where the big life-changing news was going to happen. All afternoon on Thursday I fretted and compared notes with my co-workers. At the very end of the day one of my closest friends who is also a co-worker was called into her supervisor's office (after her counterpart in another area of our department was laid off entirely) and told that she was getting a reduction in salary AND having her hours cut as well as having to absorb the other person's duties... This led to me not sleeping well at ALL on Thursday night. Stomach ache. Crying.
I even cleaned out the majority of any personal effects from my desk before I left on Thursday. See, the last job I had before this was my dream job and I lost it one day without a clue. Without warning. And I told myself NEVER AGAIN would I get caught that unaware. I have and will always have a box under my desk. Just in case.
So, on Friday morning I woke up at 4:50am. Wide awake. Not even my cat believed me when I got up and started paying bills online. The night before I had figured out my budget in case I was cut by 1 day a week (as had already happened to others) and I had bills to pay in case... I got to work on time. Zero appetite for any breakfast so I drank water and tried to concentrate. By this time almost every person in my office had a meeting set up with our boss. Without going into the details of exactly what happened in the meeting I will say this: I am both incredibly lucky and thankful. They did cut my job, the job that I was doing up until Friday, but then they also gave me increased responsibilities for what amounts to the lead position in the office. With no cuts. There were only 2 other people that I know of in the office that did not have their pay or hours cut on Friday.
I am someone that firmly believes in being willing to adjust your plans and what happened to me on Friday adjusted my plans. Yes, I am still working for a boss that I could write books about (she really IS that bad) and yes I still think that management does a piss-poor job of communicating with their staff, not to mention makes crappy decisions in terms of budget. However I am no longer looking for a new job. They have shown that they trust me enough to put me into a key position at a time when they are having to make cuts all over the place. And I am going to honor that by telling myself that I will be thankful that I have a job and I am going to stop whining and work. I am not going to look for a new job. Mind you, if one falls into my lap and it's the right job? I will do that (it would be highly stupid to ignore a good opportunity). But in the meantime I will be thankful and shift my focus to this fitness journey.
Because this week I gained TWO POUNDS. And THAT is not the direction I want to go. So it's back to work. On my job and on my fitness. And focus not only on health but on being thankful. The T in TCN.
One day. One pound. One step at a time.
~N
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
static blob
doing better and getting used to the new points system (the points for things I was used to went up....good thing my daily allowance did too...) but not moving yet. I mean ok I cleaned and I brought the garbage and recycling in but not actual, I'm-doing-this-on-purpose moving....
And that is no one's fault but my own.
I just am not motivated to do it. And until I make myself do it I don't think I will get that motivation high that I get when I'm in the groove, moving constantly.
For now I am a blob on my couch. Not gaining but not losing.
Mmmmmph.
(on a completely unrelated note I put my Christmas trees up tonight. Yes trees. And those made me happy.)
One day. One pound. One step (as soon as I make myself take it) at a time.
~N
And that is no one's fault but my own.
I just am not motivated to do it. And until I make myself do it I don't think I will get that motivation high that I get when I'm in the groove, moving constantly.
For now I am a blob on my couch. Not gaining but not losing.
Mmmmmph.
(on a completely unrelated note I put my Christmas trees up tonight. Yes trees. And those made me happy.)
One day. One pound. One step (as soon as I make myself take it) at a time.
~N
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