Anyone that has known me for a moderate amount of time knows that I have a personal motto: Carpe Diem. Sometimes I jokingly say "carpet the den". It is a latin phrase that means (loosely translated by me) sieze now. Sieze this moment. Sieze today. I first heard this when I watched the movie Dead Poet's Society a looooooooooong time ago. And it just stuck with me. The power of now. The importance of paying attention to what's right in front of you. To BE here NOW. (not focused on something else)
Well, a week ago there was a horrible shooting by a mentally ill man, killed 6 people at a meeting at a grocery store. Unfortunately the debate that came out of this horrible thing was not so much "how can we help it so this kind of thing doesn't happen again? how can we be more careful with people" but finger pointing and instant politicization. It is just how things are done in this country now, maybe it's how they have always been done (see immediate responses following 9/11 and Oklahoma City) but it just seems sad that something as truly inane as politics gets in the way of humanity. People died and a young man who is very much in need of care, serious and psychiatric care has obviously never gotten any.
I don't talk politics anymore, this may be the most you'll see ever on here. Too divisive. And I appreciate that I do not have the same views as many of my friends. I just don't see the point in arguing. It's like arguing over what kind of toilet paper to use, and in my opinion deals with just about the same stuff.
So why am I talking about it here? Because 2 days ago a friend of mine from work, a nurse named Stephanie who has worked at my hospital for over 30 years (she's only 55) had a stroke after leaving work. I'm not clear on exactly what happened but her mom found her in her car. And she's in the hospital and has what's called aphasia. My friend Jess who reads this blog from exotic points around the globe will know exactly what that is. Basically what's going on with Steph is that she knows what words she wants to say but she can't make herself say them. Yeah. Think about that for a minute. When someone asks you if you want cream and sugar in your coffee and you go to say "yes please" instead you say "crackers paperclip" or something equally as strange. Basic communication. And she may not be able to come back to work. Ever.
Just like that. In an instant. I walked by her on my way out the door on Tuesday night. Clocking out. Smiled. Just like always.
One of the things I said in my first post on here was that one of the reasons I want to get healthy is because I know that being obese/overweight puts you at risk for cardiac disease and stroke. Steph is short and round. And it's likely the combo of stress at work and the round part that made this possible.
I'm still working on trying to find a way to eat good food at work (dear GOD that Medifast stuff isn't doing it for me.....) but I am at least getting up and moving more.
Because I want to live.
One day. One pound. One step at a time.
~N
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